February 02, 2012
Top five regrets of the dying
From The Guardian:
There was no mention of more sex or bungee jumps. A palliative nurse who has counselled the dying in their last days has revealed the most common regrets we have at the end of our lives. And among the top, from men in particular, is 'I wish I hadn't worked so hard'. Bronnie Ware is an Australian nurse who spent several years working in palliative care, caring for patients in the last 12 weeks of their lives. She recorded their dying epiphanies in a blog called Inspiration and Chai, which gathered so much attention that she put her observations into a book called The Top Five Regrets of the Dying. Ware writes of the phenomenal clarity of vision that people gain at the end of their lives, and how we might learn from their wisdom. "When questioned about any regrets they had or anything they would do differently," she says, "common themes surfaced again and again." Here are the top five regrets of the dying, as witnessed by Ware.
More here.
Posted by Azra Raza at 06:11 AM | Permalink
Comments
How do we know the dying have clarity of vision and not panicked delusion?
Posted by: X | Feb 2, 2012 9:46:24 AM
Mine would be:
1. I wish I had dropped so-called "friends" much sooner.
2. I wish I had more money to travel more.
3. I wish I had worked harder (see #2)
4. I wish I had learned Chinese instead of French
5. Can someone, please, get rid of Groundhog Day?
Posted by: reader | Feb 2, 2012 10:31:23 AM
For everthing you might want to know about death and dying short of having the personal experience of same, please see my compilation of books and articles available here: http://ratiojuris.blogspot.com/2009/07/death-dying-selected-bibliography.html
Posted by: Patrick S. O'Donnell | Feb 2, 2012 11:02:12 AM
X-
The list of regrets in the article seem quite reasonable and profoundly universal. Hardly the rantings of a lunatic. What delusion would make you happy that you lost touch with friends? What kind of panic makes you NOT want to be true to yourself? This is clearly thoughtful reflection and not brain damage.
Posted by: ray Butlers | Feb 2, 2012 1:32:34 PM
I would like to address the concept of "working harder". I maintain that there is nothing wrong with hard work. I think what they are saying is that they wished they were home more. They may or may not have had control over this and they should not feel guilty about doing what they had to do. Speaking for myself, I only work "hard" (meaning extra hours) when my job is at stake, not because I prefer it to being home or sleeping.
But then again, being "home more" isn't always good and doesn't always teach children what they need to learn.
That said, different types of work are "harder" for different types of people. Physical work is mentally easy but physically hard. Office work is physicially easy, but mentally hard. Or vice versa. In any case, we shouldn't confuse effort with attitude or status.
Posted by: ray Butlers | Feb 2, 2012 1:38:23 PM
I suspect they were doing work they didn't enjoy. That's a mistake. In my opinion the keys to a good life are simple: a career you love to do and a spouse you love to be with. Get those and you won't have much to regret.
Posted by: reader | Feb 2, 2012 2:18:31 PM
Be content,eat simple but delicious food, boycott shopping,
enjoy your work but hardly work, travel whenever, my mind is always flying. Have fun.
Posted by: Nas R | Feb 2, 2012 8:08:45 PM
Please me have no regrets...
Posted by: eli | Feb 2, 2012 11:26:44 PM
Find work you love, a woman you love, listen to lots of good music, travel, exercise, eat small amounts of non-industrialized food you prepare yourself,avoid annoying people, don't compare what you have to what others have,avoid all stupid, ignorant and superstitious things and never be afraid of long run on sentences.
Posted by: reader | Feb 3, 2012 10:39:14 AM
I just wish someone would have explained to me, in my youth, just how marginalised the elderly can become.
Posted by: Laturb | Feb 10, 2012 9:33:53 PM
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