The Two Gentlemen of Lebowski

Shakespearepicture What if Shakespeare wrote The Big Lebowski? Adam Bertocci gives it a go, in case you haven’t read this already.

[Enter LEBOWSKI, on a cart. Exit BRANDT]

LEBOWSKI

Marry, sir!—You be Lebowski, I be Lebowski, ‘tis a wondrous strange comedy of errors. But I am a man of business, as I imagine you are; tell me what you’d have me do for you.

THE KNAVE

Sir, I possess a rug, that, i’faith, tied the room together—

LEBOWSKI

You sent Brandt a messenger on horseback; he inform’d me. Where is my fitting?

THE KNAVE

They sought thee, these two gentlemen—

LEBOWSKI

I shall repeat; you sent Brandt a messenger on horseback; he inform’d me. Where is my fitting?

THE KNAVE

Then thou art aware ‘twas thy rug, sir, that was the target of this crime.

LEBOWSKI

Was it I, sir, who urinated on your rug?

[H/t: Darcy James Argue]