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October 26, 2006

The Overachievers: The Secret Lives of Driven Kids

From The Atlantic:

Book_15 The frenzy of academic competition, particularly among affluent American families, has triggered a spate of cautionary new books. The titles reviewed here are all excellent: I give them all A+'s -- or, in the parlance of today's elite high schoolers, weighted GPAs of 4.687, including 5's in fifteen AP courses and a combined math/verbal SAT score of 1540.

Of course, I'm a biased reader; in my estimation, there can't be enough books written on the topic. I say, let's hurl them, one by one, at today's frenzied "helicopter parents," who deserve to be, if not bombarded, at least given a simple clonk over the head with a frying pan while a trained therapist yells, "Stop the insanity!"

Winning admission to a coveted college is so do-or-die that today's über-protective parents leave nothing to chance -- which is to say, nothing to the bumbling students themselves. For our most obsessively college-minded parents, it seems foolhardy to allow high-school seniors to track the progress of their own applications, to solicit their own letters of recommendation, even to write their own autobiographical essays about why they want to go to college. At a certain point, one might ask who is actually hoping to pull on that crimson sweatshirt.

In a telling USA Today essay on such parents, the MIT admissions head, Marilee Jones, wrote that they even "make excuses for their child's bad grades and threaten to sue high school personnel who reveal any information perceived to be potentially harmful to their child's chances of admission." (Indeed, in The Overachievers, Alexandra Robbins points out that the number of teachers purchasing liability insurance rose by 25 percent between 2000 and 2005.)

And when these litigious parents' work is well done, they need only stand back as their mini-me's shamble forward, robotlike, hurling lawsuits for them.

More here.

Posted by Azra Raza at 06:57 AM | Permalink

Comments

Spot on, as an Ivy admissions officer way back when, I experienced the beginning of this tsunami. However, from my vantage point of a midwestern MooU, I can safely say that such anxiety occupies but a TINY proportion of families. But since these are the families who read the NYT and such, I am sure we will see more of these books...perhaps a niche market can be developed for books and products and services for recovering helicopter parents, strictly (north)east coast, LA, SF, and north shore of Chicago...

Posted by: A. G. Rud | Oct 26, 2006 8:31:11 AM

The phenomenon is where I am, and it's difficult to resist. If only we could all disarm. Reassuring to read the above comment, though. Is it too late to move to the Midwest?

Posted by: Flounder | Oct 26, 2006 7:01:06 PM

Flounder, hang in there. If you live in the Chappequas, the New Canaans, the Chevy Chases, the Winnetkas, the Orindas, or the BevHills of the country, you may have to grin and bear it. But if you can get out of those places, you will find most people don't have the race for the Ivy trophies anywhere on their radar.

Posted by: A. G. Rud | Oct 26, 2006 10:53:54 PM

In Time Magazine, Po Bronson and Ashley Merryman have some great commentary that put this and other similar phenomenon into perspective.

Here's a snip:

"I bring this up because I sense the media is increasingly ignoring the true American family, and instead is putting the dramas of affluent families on Page One. It would be okay if they delivered these portraits with a sardonic wink, so that we might laugh at the foibles of the well-off. But there is no wink. Instead, we are asked to sympathize with people's self-made problems, and these affluent-family issues are held up as representative of us all."

And one more:

"As this constant misrepresentation trickles down to the lower classes, it causes unintended consequences. It teaches the paranoia to people who don't have the problem. Parents who didn't even know college placement specialists existed are suddenly panicked that they should sell their Chevy to hire one."

Posted by: robertogreco | Oct 27, 2006 1:07:19 AM

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